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Showing posts from March, 2016

Sister Day, 2016

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Somehow my sister and I managed to see each other within the last twelve months, and still didn't manage to get a picture together. I'm not sure how we keep doing this, except that both of us are usually the person behind the camera. As evidenced here, at my niece's graduation party.


Seriously, it's getting ridiculous. In 2013, we managed to see each other a record-breaking three times in one year, and still didn't get a photo together.

It's Sister Day, a little holiday Melanie and I invented when we were girls growing up in Massachusetts. I wrote about it once before, detailing how we invented a holiday that Hallmark has yet to embrace. And unfortunately, it's yet another Sister Day we don't spend together.

That would be the best part about being rich, I think. The ability to simply hop a plane and go see my loved ones would be a gift greater than any I could imagine. My husband has met my sister exactly once? Twice? She had to miss our wedding becaus…

Snippets - Childless Edition

Boy was visiting his grandparents for spring break last week. Thus, we were left to our own devices and had no idea how much milk to buy.

For the purposes of this Snippet, you should understand that Jim can text me from his iPad. And that texting is our primary form of marital communication, given our divergent schedules.

JIM: Hon! Run Find My iPhone! Someone stole my phone out of class!
ME: *scrambles to FMiP, runs locator, cannot find because phone is off, locks phone and sets locator sound*
JIM: Never mind, found it. Everything is okay.
ME: Oops. I just locked it.
JIM: Unlock it when you can, love.
ME: I can't until it's online. Turn it back on, goofball.
JIM: Sorry. It slipped down into my bag.
ME: *disdainful smilie* Is it working?
JIM: Just called you. Can you call back?
ME: Give me a second, sparky. I was in the middle of something.

Later...

ME: Okay, what can we learn from this experience?
JIM: I'm sorry.
ME: First, keep your damn phone on. You can set it to silent…

Filmucation: Da Godfaddah

The Filmucation of Boy continued tonight with the conclusion of The Godfather Part II. It had been so long since we started the saga (Christmas!) that we had to go back and start over. Fortunately we didn't have to rewatch The Godfather, since he remembered most of that. I did have to pause to explain the entire history of Cuba and the Mafia investigations of the 1960s.

Now, of course, he keeps calling me madre. I started to call him paisan, but then we remembered that means "brother." Thanks to Google Translate, I can now pop back with mio figlio. I am one-quarter Sicilian, and Boy was disappointed to do the math and realize he is only one-eighth Sicilian. (That we know of; while I'm pretty sure of my ethnic mix, Boy's father was adopted and his only paternal grandparent-by-blood that we know of was also adopted, so that side of his bloodline is pretty much a big question mark.)

And now.... snippets! With spoilers, but seriously - you haven't seen these movie…

Snippets

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JIM: OH!
JIM: OH!
JIM: OH!
JIM: I got 9 out of 10 for my editing quiz! And 18 out of 20 for my last written assignment! Oh!
ME: ...
ME: Three 'ohs' texted to me while I'm interviewing a congressional candidate. I'll get you, my pretty, and your awesome grades too.
JIM: Oh...
ME: Go oh yourself.
JIM: Yes!
ME: When will you stop being surprised that you're smart?
JIM: When I get the fucking diploma in my grubby hands.
ME: Your hands better be clean at your graduation, buster.
JIM: [redacted]
ME: It says something about your character that you text rude hand gestures to your beloved wife.
JIM: I love you.


US: [long discussion redacted]
JIM: FUCKWADS
ME: See, you're such a diplomat. It's that smooth, balanced way of expressing yourself that really makes an impact on people.
JIM: Yes. I'm a peach.
ME: *snorfle*
JIM: [series of kissy emojis]
ME: Oh lord, you're schmooping again.
JIM: I think, therefore I schmoop.


Watching Buffy...

CHARACTER: Where is Warr…

Bad idea...

Note: Boy has not been watching Agent Carter with me. Like most of you. Would you watch this show already before they kill it?

So I'm watching Agent Carter and Boy walks into the room.

CHARACTER: What if we use gamma rays to -
BOY: NO.
ME: *bursts out laughing*
BOY: Just no.
ME: So not having watched the show over the last two seasons, knowing nothing about the technobabble plot...
BOY: Gamma rays. Bad idea.
ME: *still giggling* It never really does work out, does it?
BOY: What is this? Is that Howard Stark?
ME: Agent Carter, and yes. You really should be watching this.
BOY: *evil grin* Nah, it's about a woman...
ME: See, you say stuff like that and you think you're funny, but what you're really doing is making sure you don't get dinner.
BOY: Ha ha, there's laws.
ME: Don't push that one too hard.