Showing posts from September, 2016

Snippets: Old Age Edition

ME: Oh no. Not possible.
JIM: What?
ME: When I started working at the newspaper, I was in the bureau office, and we had these two secretaries who answered the phone and took down messages on actual paper because well shut up, okay?
JIM: Okay.
ME: And one of those secretaries, a very nice lady named Connie, was pregnant. And she had a baby.
JIM: Okay.
ME: The baby just got her driver's license.
JIM: *chortles*
ME: Shut up! You may be used to being old, but I'm struggling with it!
JIM: I'm ooooold.
ME: Yes, I know, but I thought I was young until five minutes ago!

BOY: What are you doing?
ME: Baking cookies. Chocolate chip.
BOY: What for?
ME: Scouts.
BOY: Um.
ME: What? We're all supposed to bring something.
BOY: Everybody always just brings storebought stuff.
ME: Ha. When have you ever known me to bring storebought anything when I can bake?

(Note: First attempt at cookies using the new stand mixer was a success.)

ME: Honey! JCPenney is offering a special …