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Showing posts from August, 2011

The Cutting Edge of Humor

J's workplace had a serious discussion on boxcutter safety today. He made the grave error of telling me about it. He should know better than to serve up such a rich source of puns to a master such as myself.

ME: I think you should run around the warehouse waving your boxcutter.
J: I think I'd get arrested.
ME: Yeah, but it'd be funny. At least then management would get the point.
J: ... I'll talk to you later, hon.
ME: Hey, I thought that one was pretty sharp.
J: *groan*

By text later...

J: Your puns are a cut above the rest.
ME: Hey, I think this boxcutter issue cuts both ways. Take a stab at it, and I think you'll find it's better to be naughty than knife.
J: Yuck!
ME: Have a knife day, dear.
J: ...
ME: Don't be so dull, or they'll think you can't hack it.

After work...

ME: Silence? Hey, this is better than playing with slice cubes.*
J: Ouch! enough!
ME: Oh, you cut me the quick, and when you've always congratulated me on my sharp wit. Well, sha…

Farandole

Pandora is an amazing thing. Yes, I'm the last person in the world to know this. It's radio that doesn't suck. It's randomly wonderful. I keep finding new songs I really love, I can torment my son with '80s hair metal, and he makes me listen to "top hits" that make my teeth hurt.

I had it set on the classical station for a while today as I did other things. What came out was a piece of my youth.

Once upon a time I played the cello. Badly. I played for seven years and never got any better, but that was okay, because I loved it so much. I played in the Springfield Youth Symphony Orchestra in Springfield, Mass. and my favorite piece was the farandole.

I didn't know WHICH farandole, mind you. Only that it was an astounding piece of music and I barely could keep up with the cello part. I found it once on an audiocassette and played it incessantly - something about its soaring melodies and remarkable harmonies spoke to me. Then I lost the audiocassette, and…