Snippets: Ice Cream and Immortality

It's so relaxing to finish a work day, go to a three-hour writing session, and then snag groceries and three gallons of milk at Wal-mart... said no mom ever.

ME: *texts* At Wal-mart. Anything you need?
BOY: Ice cream and Oreos.
ME: NEED
BOY: I need ice cream and Oreos.
ME: Which do you NEED more?
BOY: Ice cream.

However, feeding and housing a teenage boy means I theoretically have someone to help bring in the groceries.

ME: Get the milk out of the back seat.
BOY: First I want hugs.
ME: Oh, you like me today?
BOY: I missed my mom! Wait, did you get me ice cream?
ME: Sorry. Too expensive.
BOY: What?
ME: I checked out the generic ice cream but they were all out of cookies-n-cream.*
BOY: Humph.
ME: What, no hugs now?
BOY: You didn't get me ice cream!
ME: Oh, so I have to buy you ice cream to get hugs?
BOY: No, but you get more hugs with ice cream.

After unloading the groceries...

ME: Oh, put this in the freezer, would you? *hands him quart of cookies-n-cream ice cream*
BOY: ...You liar.
ME: You're so easy.
BOY: But you're so cheap I would believe you.
ME: Mean! Someday when I'm gone, you'll look back and wish you'd been nicer to me.
BOY: Ha! You're not going to die.
ME: Not soon, but someday!
BOY: Never. You're never going to die.
ME: How am I going to manage that?
BOY: You're immortal.


* This is the only flavor he considers eating.