In which the author has the mentality of a twelve-year-old

SCENE: Eville Writers write-in. Jimmy is, as usual, struggling with Microsoft Word.

JIMMY: *frowns at laptop*
ME: What's wrong?
JIMMY: Can you help me get my thing back up?
ME: ...
ME: *snorfle*
OTHER WRITERS: *knowing glances*
ME: *cover mouth with hands*
JIMMY: *looks at me* Oh.... hush. You know what I mean.
ME: Rarely. *smirk*
JIMMY: The... thing. With the fonts.
ME: The formatting palette. Look under "View."
JIMMY: Thank you. *taptaptap*
ME: *smirk*
JIMMY: (under his breath) Devil woman.

What I should have said: "Honey, I can help you, but we want to be allowed back here someday..."