big giant hearts

Today's dinner break was a quick run to the grocery store, as we are out of everything. It was the funniest grocery trip in ages.

My local grocery also has a full-service florist and a chocolatier. And every time I turned a corner, there was another confused male standing in front of a display, looking chagrined. One guy stared at the chocolate-covered strawberries for so long I wanted to go over to him and say, "It's okay, man. I swear she'll like them."

The line at the florist counter was five deep. All men. The card aisle: thronged with men. Each of them with this stunned look on their faces. I felt the need to Tweet.

ME: It is hilarious watching all the men staring blankly at flower and chocolate displays. Guys, you knew this was coming. How could you miss it?
JIMMY: Hon, we're dumb.
ME: No man better complain about excessive V-Day ads, is all I'm saying.

As I stood in the checkout line, there was a girl of no more than twenty behind the register and a boy of the same age bagging groceries.

GIRL: And how are you today, ma'am?
ME: Amused.
GIRL: *blink*
ME: *points behind her*

The girl and boy both turn to see the chocolatier, which has a gigantic three-foot sign screaming, "VALENTINE'S DAY IS FEB. 14!" You know, as opposed to the Valentine's Day we celebrate in August.

And right under that sign is a line stretching practically to the door, all men holding chocolate, flowers, stuffed animals and other items that I guarantee will cost half as much tomorrow.

GIRL: *giggles* It's not like they didn't know. It's the same day every year.
BOY: I haven't seen this many men shopping alone in this store since I started working here.
ME: I've been giggling the whole time I've been here. You know, we women have to buy stuff too. But notice how we plan ahead?
GIRL: Look at all that chocolate. Jeez, the only card I got was from my mom.
BOY: Well, you could always go out for ice cream with me after shift.


He asked her out right in front of me. It was adorable. I do believe they're heading to Coldstone Creamery, and I wish them all the best.

Happy V-day to all of you!

And guys... the ads are there for a reason.


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