Post-Election* Snippets
MAN: Some of our friends need to be more careful. These highly attractive women wanting to be my friend have mutual friends with me. ME: The highly attractive woman looking for a good man? MAN: Yes. I get these friend requests from these gorgeous supermodels who are all about friending me and I'm all, "Delete." ME: Now now, hon. Who's to say an attractive woman would not be falling all over herself for you? MAN: *eyebrow of skepticism* Not these women, hon. ME: So you're saying there's no way an attractive woman would be attracted to you? MAN: That's right. ME: So you're saying I'm not attractive? MAN: ... MAN: ... ME: *wide grin* MAN: Woman! ME: *guffaw* Oh honey. It's right in front of you, a giant pit, and you go and just jump on in. ----- BOY: What's for dinner? ME: Food. BOY: There are mashed potatoes on the counter, but no other food. ME: Yes there is. There's a roast in the oven. BOY: *makes face* Roast? ME: ...